Top 25 Memories for 2010

I'm a forward thinking person and I can't wait for the New Year to come in and bring all of the opportunities, blessings, exciting experiences and even challenges with it.  But it's important to look back from time to time.  So here's my Top 25 Memories from 2010, in rough chronological order:

#25 - Going to Annapolis, MD with Marsha to celebrate our 17th wedding anniversary.
#24 - Pastor Charles, from Nairobi, Kenya, visited our church and nation's capital.
#23 - Blizzard #1.
#22 - Radicalis Conference at Saddleback Church with our staff.
#21 - Dinner with staff at Lucille's (best BBQ in Southern CA.
#20 - Blizzard #2
#19 - Sending our team off to the DR to distribute OCC shoeboxes for the first time.
#18 - Meetings to begin forming Side By Side Ministries.
#17 - Serving the homeless of Fairfax Country through Hypothermia Relief Week.
#16 - Trip to NC to visit family.
#15 - Meeting Pastor Fidel from the DR - An amazing person doing great things with so little.
#14 - Listening to the first sermon ever preached at FCBC on adoption.  God is still doing things because of it.
#13 - Attending a wedding in Princeton for someone who I've had the pleasure of watching grow up.
#12 - Starting the process for master planning for our campus.
#11 - Staff "Play and Pray Retreat" at Lake Gaston.
#10 - All of the dinners at home we had as a family and the conversations that happened at them.
#9 - Reading all the blog posts from our Kenya Sports Camp Team.
#8 - Sending the kids back to school and being thankful for how much they are growing and how awesome they are.
#7 - Hearing Abbey pray and give her heart to Christ.
#6 - Getting to go with Andrew on his first youth trip (Middle-school Retreat.)
#5 - Joining the pastor's coaching network and getting to learn from some really great people.
#4 - Operation Christmas Child Box-packing Party.
#3 - Watching the Cowboys beat the Redskins.
#2 - Christmas Eve Service and being thankful that I was well enough to attend.
#1 - Celebrating with Marsha our 18th wedding anniversary early - dinner and a movie.

Christmas Eve

Can't wait for our Christmas Eve Service tonight.  I got hit by a virus pretty hard yesterday.  Feeling better now and hopefully will make it tonight.  I love seeing people pausing long enough to remember what it's all about.

What Christmas Is All About According to My 7 Year Old

Abbey set up our family's nativity set this year.  I think she understands what Christmas is all about.  Everyone, regardless of status (and even the animals) is at the same place - worshipping Christ.

How The World Has Changed in the Last 200 Years

This video amazed me at the progress we have made in the last 200 years and gave me hope about what can be accomplished in the next 200 years. It has huge implications for the church.

The Power of Relationships

I believe people were created to be in relationship with other people; God wired us for others. This video is one of the most creative and powerful illustration of just how much we need other people.

So whether it's family, best-friends, people you love to hang out with at work, your small group or ministry team at church, always put relationships first in your life - they're that important and you never know what around the corner.

Enjoy!

Following the Star

A while back I wrote a post called Time With God.  In it I included a short list of tools to help us develop the habit of spending time with God daily.  One of those tools was an online devotional called d365.  It's a very creative and interactive devotional.

For the Christmas season, they've created a daily Advent devotional called Following the Star.  Check it out.  It's a great chance to slow your pace, get some focus, remember what the next few weeks are all about and capture some moments.

Under the Overpass

I joined Blogging for Books last month and just got my first book.  Basically how it works is you register with them, pick a book, they send it to you for free and then you read and blog about it.  I figured since I usually blog about some of the books I read I might as well get some books for free and help the publisher out in the process.

So my first book, Under the Overpass, came in this week.  It was written by a guy name Mike Yankoski.  Mike, and his friend Sam, spent five months on the streets of Denver, Washington, D.C., Portland, San Francisco, Phoenix and San Diego living among the homeless.

John Ashmen, president, Association of Gospel Rescue Mission wrote one of the forwards:

Every once in a while a book comes along that is so raw and revealing it proves to be a catalyst for cognizance and conviction for multiple generations.  Under the Overpass is such a book.  Mike and Sam's five-month journey through the underbelly of America was not a brazen stunt by bored college students but a quest born out of guilt and curiosity that became a Christ-fueled passion for the poor and dispossessed.  I know Mike and am inspired by the fact that his zeal has intensified over time.  He lives what he learned on the streets.  Be careful as you read this timely book; it could radically change your perceptions and maybe even your calling. 

From 2 Percent to 98 Percent

A couple of months ago I joined a local coaching network with nine other pastors.  It’s not just a meet-up group for socializing; it actually requires a pretty serious investment.  There’s a financial investment, a time investment, and an emotional investment.

Once a month I make an hour long drive to Fredericksburg to meet for two hours, and then lunch, with the group.  Then, once a month I drive back to Fredericksburg to meet one-on-one with my coach.  There’s also monthly reading assignments.  I joined this group for one reason; I think every leader should regularly connect with other leaders who are further down the road than they are. 

The network is coached by a guy named Dee, who is a local pastor with a ton of wisdom and experience.  He’s also someone who is not afraid to ask tough questions and say difficult things.

At our last meeting, over lunch, we were talking about Christmas traditions at our churches.  Dee mentioned that for those of us who have special services, like Christmas Eve services, we have the opportunity to double our attendance.  I quickly, without thinking about who I was talking too, said that I believed we could double our guest attendance but that not our total attendance because so many regular folks are away for the holiday.

Dee was quick to challenge us to think bigger than that.  That we can in fact double our attendance this Christmas because people are more likely to attend during the holidays.  I’ve thought a lot about that conversation.  I’ve also done some research and I both liked and didn’t like what I found.

Here’s what Thom Rainer, author of The Unchurched Next Door, and a researcher for Lifeway Research, found in a recent survey:

·      82% of people who don’t attend church are likely to attend if invited.

·      98% of church-goers NEVER extend an invitation in a given year.

That first statistic is amazing; that we don’t really have to do a lot to get people to come to church and experience the wonderful community that is FCBC.  All we have to do is personally invite them.

The second statistic though, is troubling.  That only 2% of us who have experienced the love and grace of Christ and are connected to a faith community have invited someone outside of that community to join us.

I want to challenge all of us this Christmas to change that statistic, at least for FCBC.  Let’s not be a church of 2%, but rather, let’s flip that number around a be a church where 98% of us invite someone this Christmas. 

Can you imagine what could happen if we did that?  If 98% of us invited one person to church this Christmas and they said yes?  It would mean Dee was right; we can double our attendance.  But not just that; we’d double the number of people who would hear the true message of Christmas.  And that’s a life-changer. 

So what name is coming to your mind right now?  A friend?  Coworker?  Neighbor?  A family member?  Who will you invite?

Don't Just Do Something, Stand There!

I follow a blog by a guy named Seth Godin.  Seth is a creative communicator and always has a unique perspective on some of the simplest things in life.  He wrote a blog entry last week with the same title as this one; a short three line entry.

What if you spent one day a week (hey, even a day a month) without meetings, phone or email?

How will you know unless you try?

Last Sunday at our church I talked about how to capture the moments this Christmas.  How, if we don't figure out how to hit the pause button this Christmas and just be in that moment, we will miss some incredible opportunities to enhance our relationship with God and with others.

So what if, in the next three weeks, we took Seth's challenge?  What if we actually took a day where we unplugged, turned off the cell phone, logged off of Facebook, burned a vacation day, cancelled meetings, did no shopping, and just spent the day dedicated to the most important relationships in our lives?

How would that change us, not just this Christmas, but forever?

Sunday Reflection

Great day of worship as we started Advent.  I love the four Sundays between Thanksgiving and Christmas.  Moving from a position of gratitude toward a position of anticipation is always exciting.   Can't wait to see what this Christmas season holds.

This morning we talked about "capturing the moments" this Christmas.  I define a moment as "something that would happen that would enhance our relationship with God and/or the people around us.  I think it's so important for us to find some margin, in the middle of all the busyness, to connect with God and the people in our lives.

I've been fighting a col for the last week and felt terrible when I woke up.  I loaded up on medicine and asked God for the energy I didn't have.  Between him and Starbucks I managed.  Glad I did.  Worship always energizes me.

That's What Christmas Is All About

This Sunday is the first week of Advent; four of my favorite Sundays in the year.  We'll also be launching a new series this Sunday that we're calling That's What Christmas Is All About.  The title comes from a line, spoken by Linus, in The Charlie Brown Christmas Special.  Charlie Brown asks a question that I think a lot of people want to know the answer to - "Isn't there anyone who knows what Christmas is all about?"  Linus gives him the answer.

For the next four weeks, at FCBC, we'll be looking at four words that remind us of what Christmas is all about - capturing, restoring, releasing and changing.  This Sunday we'll talk about "Capturing the Moment."  God has some things to show us this Christmas, but if we're not ready for those moments we'll miss them.

150 Volunteers + 2 Hours = 1245 Shoe Boxes

Free Speech and Followers of Christ

Last week in the Northern Virginia area there was a lot of press attention given to the Westboro Baptist Church.  They had several protests scheduled in the area, including a local public high school.  It ended up not being the story the press was expecting.  Five people from WBC showed up to the protest and were met with over 200 counter-protestors.

According the Westboro's website, they have conducted 44,517 protests and demonstrations since June, 1991, many aimed at homosexual parades and gay-themed events, and at more than 400 military funerals for US soldiers, whom Westboro's site says, "God has killed in Iraq/Afghanistan in righteous judgment against an evil nation." WBC has a right to protest and express their views like all of us do.  They have a right to be angry and express their anger with mean spirited signs and protests.  They have a right to be bad parents and bring their kids to the protest.  But when a follower of Christ, whether as an individual or as a church, claims to be doing the work of God there is a very high standard that has to be met. The standard that has to be met is simple - love.  "Imitate God, therefore, in everything you do, because you are his dear children.  Live a life filled with love, following the example of Christ. He loved us and offered himself as a sacrifice for us, a pleasing aroma to God." Ephesians 5:1-2 (NLT) Once we claim to be a follower of Christ we are not longer just exercising a right, we are representing Christ.  Whether it's in a conversation at work, a post on FaceBook, a protest or counter-protest, or something we write in a blog - once we claim to be a Christ follower we are representing him and there's a high standard to be met. Scripture tells us over and over, in many different ways, that we are called to speak the truth.  But the standard of scripture is love; that everything we do and say should flow out of love for the person we are saying it to.  Sometimes, when we apply that standard, it will mean we want be able to say anything at all.

Marine Corps Birthday

I have a friend who reminds me every year of the Marine Corps birthday.  Today is the 235th birthday of the Marine Corps.  This past Monday I attended the funeral for a man who had served as a marine.  I'm always impressed when I see the honor guard and how much attention is given to detail and how much respect is given to the individual and their family.

So for all of the marines out there, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!  And to everyone who has served, is currently serving or has lost someone they love in the line of duty, thank you for your commitment, your bravery, your sacrifice and for protecting our freedoms.

What Right Do You Have to Be Angry?

"But the Lord replied, 'Is it right for you to be angry?'" Jonah 4:4  

That's basically the end of the book of Jonah.  Even though it's not the last verse it is the last thing communicated between God and Jonah chronologically.  And it's a great questions.

Jonah was angry that God extended grace to the people of Nineveh - Jonah's enemies.  And God asks him were he gets the right to be angry.  God was saying "Jonah, after all the chances I gave you and after all the ways I intervened in your life to show you grace, what right do you have to be angry that I extended the same grace to the people of Nineveh?"

If I were to summarize the entire book of Jonah, here's how I would do it:

• God loves you too much to leave you alone.  No matter how far or how long you run from his call on your life, he never stops pursuing you and he never stops intervening.

• God loves your enemies as much as he loves you.   The uniqueness of God’s love is not that he loves a particular group, it’s that his love is not based on our performance.  And that he loves everyone.

• God will sometimes call you to be an instrument of grace in the life of the "enemy" you're struggling with. 

Will the Election Change Anything?

Two years ago an entire political party was thrown out of office; the party that replaced it ran on a campaign of change.  Now, two years later that party has lost a significant amount of it's political power and the opposing party ran on change.

So the question is will this election change anything?

In the third chapter of the book of Jonah there's an amazing story.  It's a story of a culture that was changed.  Here it is in a nutshell:

Jonah goes to the city of Nineveh and tells them that God does NOT want to destroy them but that He want to love, forgive, restore and lead them.  And then, when the people hear that, God begins to work in their hearts and they begin to move in a new direction.  When they hear that God loves them and wants to be connected to them, their hearts melt and they begin to change.  In fact the story tells us that EVERYONE begins to change.  AND because the people changed, so did the culture.

The people start fasting and wearing sackcloths - all symbols of repentance.  Here's where the story gets interesting to me.  When the king (the political power) sees what the people are doing, he creates a law saying that everyone should do what they are already doing.

Now it’s not this newly established law that causes the people to repent, it’s the word of God at work in their hearts that causes that.  In fact in this case the law is somewhat irrelevant.  The law that’s getting established here by the king, simply reflects what’s already going on in the culture; in the hearts of the people.

Now that’s true with most laws.  Generally, in most cultures, most laws function more like a thermometer than like a thermostat.  In most cultures, most laws tell you more about the moral temperature of the culture than they determine the moral temperature of that culture.

And I think that’s something that the church should never, lose sight of.  We must never lose sight of the fact that the moral temperature of a culture is not primarily determined by the people who are in power or by the laws that are in place.  It’s determined by what’s going on in the hearts of the people.

Now does that mean that Christians should not be concerned about who’s in power?  No, we should be very concerned.  History teaches us that evil people, entrusted with lots of power can do really bad things.  We should be concerned about who’s in power. 

Does it mean that we should not be concerned about the laws of the land?  No. We absolutely should be concerned about that.  Because bad laws can create a lot of injustice in a culture and as followers of Christ we should be concerned about that.

It DOES mean that what we see in Nineveh, is generally how God works; that generally cultures are changed, not primarily by the laws that are created, but by the hearts that are transformed by the word of God.

And that's something that the church should never forget.

What Ever It Takes

Here's some pics from Samaritan's Purse showing how they do whatever it takes to get the Operation Christmas Child Shoeboxes to kids around the world.  Enjoy!

 

Operation Narnia

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Threader is set to be released Dec. 10.  I love the The Chronicles of Narnia.  My entire family loves them.  But something I love even more, is Operation Christmas Child.

OCC is a project of Samaritan's Purse that takes shoeboxes filled with toys, candy, clothes and school supplies to vulnerable children around the world.  The boxes are distributed through local churches.  And along with these small gifts, the children learn that not only do other people in the world love and care about them but so does God.  It's an amazing thing to be a part of.

So why do I mention The Chronicles of Narnia?  Here's why.  This year the creators of Narnia and Samaritan's Purse have teamed up to help get 8 million boxes to children who don't have anything.  Anyone who knows me, knows that I love partnerships.  I love when people and groups come together to tackle a big problem.  I think this partnership is just really cool.

Check it out at this link.  Go see Narnia on Dec. 10.  And pack some shoeboxes and drop them off at a collection center near you.

How Should I Vote This Tuesday?

I can't wait for the elections to be over.  Elections are emotional, full of rhetoric and usually have a number of negative ads.  But this one seems to have more of all of that than usual.  The ads enough are enough to make paying for a DVR worth it.

Regardless of who wins and who loses, this election is going to make history.  It's going to be the most expensive mid-term election ever, with all the campaigns combined costing over 4 billion dollars.

A friend of mine (Rusty Coram) shared some advice about how we should approach this year's election.  His advice is well worth passing on so here it is:

• Negative ads aren't good info resources.  For helpful information, do your own homework.
• What someone did 20 years ago doesn't necessarily indicate who they are today - people can change.
• Political labels aren't as telling as what a person has actually done.
• Charisma shouldn't out weigh character.
• If you don't vote, don't complain.
• If you do vote, don't complain - do something constructive

I'm proud that I live in America and have the freedoms that I have.  And it's a privilege to be a part of the election process.  I'm also a follower of Christ.  And that means that I am to honor Him in all I do.  And so before I vote this Tuesday I will pray, seek wisdom, do my part to be informed and then exercise my right and responsibility to vote. 

Sunday Reflection

We were in week two of the book of Jonah this past Sunday.  I love the book.  It's about a God that cares so much for us that he continues to pursue us no matter how far or how long we run.

Jonah would have done well to pray the four prayers we talked about Sunday.  I can't help but wonder what our world would look like if everyone who claims to follow God or is seeking God would pray those four prayers.  They are four prayers that not only have the power to change us but also everyone around us.

If you missed it check it out here:  Intervention: Staying Connected to the Heart of God.

Intervention: Getting Our Attention

We launched a new series today called Intervention.  We're walking through the story of Jonah and today we talked about Getting Our Attention.

The audio is uploaded on our website.  Click here to check it out if you missed it.  Here's a recap of what we talked about:

• God is an intervening God.  He intervenes because He loves us and wants to know and be known by us.

• God's words of judgement are also His words of grace.  They are gracious words of warning, letting us know that it's not too late to change or head in a different direction.

• ALL of us occasionally run from God

• When we're running from God, we're really running from the call of God.

• A warning sign that we're on the run is we distance ourselves from the "stuff" of God.  Scripture, prayer, worship and connections with other followers become less important to us because those are some of the ways God's call is present in our lives.

• Even when we're on the run, God still manages to get our attention.

• Every time God gets our attention we have a decision to make; do we keep running or do we get honest?

• When we get honest and stop running, God intervenes again and is there to forgive, and to save, and to restore and to put us on a different trajectory for our future.

• The cross is the symbol of God's ultimate intervention in our lives.

The best advice Warren Buffett ever received

Warren Buffet gives two pieces of advice in this short clip.  They are both things that anyone who want to have healthy relationships should follow:

"The power of unconditional love."

"You can always tell a guy to 'go to hell' tomorrow; you never give up that right.  So keep your mouth shut today and see if you feel the same way tomorrow."

Time With God

One of the challenges from this week's sermon was to spend time with God everyday.  The longer I pastor the more I realize that this is a real struggle for most followers of Christ.  I think it's a struggle for several reasons.

One, we live such busy lives that's it's easy to get moving with our day and once we are on the move it's hard to hit the brakes to realize we never connected with God.

It's also a struggle because a lot of people think that connecting with God is bigger or harder than it really is.

And finally we get legalistic about time with God.  We think that we have to pray for an hour or read from the Old and New Testaments and throw in a Psalm and Proverb.  We get into a routine and pretty soon it's about the routine and not about the relationship.

Here's three truths about time with God:

1.  We make time for the things that are important to us.  That's a fact of life.  We start our day out and we make time to shower, put on clean clothes and fix our hair, makeup, etc.  We do that because how we look to people is important to us.  We make time to get to work on time.  And we make time for that quick stop in Starbucks.  We make time for the things that are important to us.

2.  Lots of little spiritual bites are better than one huge one.  I’ve discovered that to be spiritually fed it doesn’t have to be about one huge spiritual feeding that you check off the list before you walk out of the house in the morning.   Instead, I've found that practicing the presence of God, and as odd as this sounds, to nibble spiritually, all throughout your day is more affective than spending an hour one time a day.

3.  Legalism will kill any relationship.  When time with God becomes about following a rule and checking off a box, the relationship will stop growing because God is more interested in us - talking with us, walking with us, being a part of our lives - than He is in any rule we come up with.

Here are some tools I use to start my day off with God.  They are simple and don't take a lot of time.  The purpose of the tools are not to go deep but to start a conversation; a conversation that will hopefully continue throughout the day.  I hope they are helpful to anyone who's struggling to connect daily with their creator.

The Journey:  This is a daily email devotional produced by the staff of Fairfax Community Church.  It walks through a book of the Bible, one chapter at a time.  The idea is to read the chapter first and then use the provided summary and questions to engage the passage on a deeper level.  This is my favorite source right now.

Drive Time Devotions:  This is a 10 minute, daily podcast led by Tom Hollaway of Saddleback Church.  Tom is a gifted teacher and an all around great guy.  I've had the pleasure of having several conversations with Tom through the years.  He's the real deal.  Simply join the podcast and download them each day.  Tom developed this for the people in his church who commuted to work everyday - hence the name.

d365:  This is a really creative looking devotional.  It was recommended to me last week by a family member so I have not had time to really test it out.  It's designed with the college student in mind but looks like a great resource for anyone who likes a more hands-on, interactive experience.  Be sure to read the instructions first and enjoy the freedom it gives you.

Middle School Retreat Video

The 80/20 Rule

I walk my kids to school everyday and say good-bye to them at the crosswalk.  We have an awesome crossing guard named Min who really loves kids and wants to make sure they are safe.  She told me today she was having to follow my 80/20 Rule.

Last year she found out I was a pastor and asked me one day how to handle a conflict she was having with a couple of parents.  She had reminded them of some of the driving and parking rules near the school and they did not take it very well.  They were pretty verbally abusive to her and it was beginning to really bother her.

I assured her she was doing the right thing to enforce the rules and make sure our kids were safe.  And then I told her about the 80/20 Rule that I try to follow.  It goes like this:  "Twenty percent of the people in your world, at any given time, are unhappy with you or don't like you and some of them actually want to see you fail.  That's just the way it is so focus on the eighty percent."

I've found that to be pretty true in life and for the most part it applies to everyone, unless you're the President, then the rule is probably reversed.

But that's just the way it is, people in your world are not always going to like you, agree with you, and some of them actually want to see you fail.  Don't focus on them.  Focus on the people who have your back, who are in your corner and who think you're great.

And never forget that regardless of who likes you and who doesn't, what mistakes you've made, when you've blown it, God loves you and accepts you just the way you are.

What I'm Reading

Sometimes I get asked what books I'm reading right now.  Currently I'm reading three books.  One for personal growth, one for professional growth and one for organizational (our church) growth.  One note, I usually like to read in groups where what I am reading can be discussed.  It's the whole "iron sharpens iron" thing.  Here's the list:

• Crazy Love by Francis Chan - It's a great book for anyone who wants to explore a relationship with Christ or grow in the one they have.  Our small group is currently going through this together each Friday night.

• Soup:  A Recipe to Nourish Your Team and Culture by Jon Gordon - This is a great book for anyone who is a leader in their organization, whether it's as a supervisor at work, the owner of a business, or in a church or other volunteer organization.  Jon works with Fortune 500 companies, professional and college sports team, hospitals, schools, universities and non-profits.   I'm reading this book with a group of 10 other pastors in a coaching network.

• Think Orange and The Orange Leader Handbook by Reggie Joiner - I'm reading both of these together because one introduces the concepts and the other is a handbook designed to lead a team through a process of incorporating the concepts.  I highly recommend them to anyone who serves in children or student ministries in a local church.  I'm currently reading Think Orange with two of our staff and plan on leading a team through the handbook after the first of the year.

1 Chronicles 14:2 says "And David knew that the LORD had established him as king over Israel and that his kingdom had been highly exalted for the sake of his people Israel."

At this point in his life David is King of one of the strongest armies in the region, he's rich beyond imagination, his family is growing, and everyone in the kingdom of Israel adores him. If that were most of us, we'd let all that go to our heads.

But David recognized that God had put him where he was, given him the position that he had, and provided him with all of those resources, not so he could use them on himself and live the good life, but so that he could make a difference in the lives of others.

He's the deal, the same is true for you and me. The resources we have, the relationships we have, the responsibilities we have, we have because God wants to use them to make a difference in someone else's life.

What is one thing that you're holding on to, that you need to let God use to make a difference in someone else's life?

Respect the Position

There's a story in the Old Testament, in 1 Chronicles 10, that tells how King Saul died. It was a pretty violent death. The enemies of Israel were closing in and so Saul falls on his own sword to keep from dying at their hands.

The enemies end up cutting off Saul's head and hanging it in the temple of one of their own gods. His three sons are also killed. And Israel basically runs for the hills.

The warrior David, who later becomes king, does an amazing thing. He brings the bodies of Saul and his sons back to Israel and buries them. That's amazing because right up to the end, Saul wanted David dead. Saul had chased David all through the country trying to kill him, to keep him from becoming king.

But David did the right thing. He showed respect to the position that Saul had - King.

It's so easy to be critical of those in leadership, those in authority. Even if we don't agree with them, we should respect those in authority and the position they have.

That may be our President or other elected officials.

It may be the men and women in the military and law enforcement who keep us safe.

Maybe it's our boss.

It could be the teacher who teaches us or our kids.

Maybe it's our Pastor or pastors.

And yes, even those who run our HOA's.

The point is, even if we don't agree with the person(s) or even respect them as individuals, we need to be respectful of the position they are in, because one day someone else will be in that position; and it could be you or I.

Is it time for you to quit?

I came across this article in a leadership newsletter I receive. It's written by a pastor for pastors but is applicable to anyone who wants to live a fulfilled life and calling. The article is based on Geri and Pete's book I Quit.

Enjoy.

By Pete Scazzero with Geri Scazzero

The journey into a profound transformation in my pastoral leadership began when my wife, Geri, said, “I quit.” Refusing to continue pretending everything was “fine,” she quit the church –and I was the pastor!

The powerful journey we took together – to “quit” the things that really don’t belong to Jesus’ kingdom and embrace the things that do – changed our personal lives, our marriage and our church.

Quitting goes hand in hand with choosing God’s will and ways. Taking up these “quits” is imperative if we are to raise up healthy, biblical churches that effectively engage the world with the gospel.

Here are the eight things we had to quit in order to truly minister to our congregation:

Quit being afraid of what others think (Choose freedom) -- I am willing to cut through the disapproval of others and do what is good, true and right. I no longer ignore the values I hold dearly out of fear.

Quit lying (Choose truth) -- The degree to which I live in the truth -- with myself, God and others -- is the degree to which I am free. By God’s grace, I will seek to speak the truth respectfully, honestly and clearly.

Quit dying to the wrong things (Choose delighting in God’s gifts) -- I will no longer set aside or devalue activities or relationships that cause my soul to be fully alive (e.g. music, dance, art, the outdoors, travel). I will lead from the joy that flows from the love of Jesus.

Quit denying anger, sadness, and fear (Choose embracing your humanity) -- I will avoid extremes -- neither neglecting my emotions nor allowing them to run my life. I will allow myself to experience them in the presence of God, calmly think them through, and then lead appropriately as the Holy Spirit directs.

Quit blaming (Choose to take responsibility) -- As a human being made in God’s image, I recognize that no one is responsible for my life but me. Unlike Adam (Genesis 3) I refuse to blame others and fall into helplessness. By His grace, I choose to lead.

Quit overfunctioning (Choose letting go) -- I will no longer do for others what they can and should do for themselves. I will push through my fears in the face of resistance, asking God for courage and wisdom. Like Jesus, I will only complete the work the Father has given me to do (John 17:4).

Quit faulty thinking (Choose to live in reality) -- I will refuse to make things bigger than they are. And I will not believe the falsehood that things will never change. I will position myself so that the Holy Spirit, and others, can correct my wrong assumptions and align me with truth (John 8:32).

Quit living someone else’s life (Choose to be yourself) -- By God’s grace I will embrace the unique life He has given me. I will listen to my God-given rhythms and let go of other people’s agenda for my leadership.

The Shoebox Lady

I had the chance to meet Mary Damron aka "The Shoebox Lady" today. Mary is a spokesperson for Samaritan's Purse and Operation Christmas Child. She was kind enough to come to our church this morning to challenge, encourage and inspire folks about Operation Christmas Child.

She is one of the most amazing speakers I've ever heard. She grew up in the poorest county in West Virginia. A few years ago she set out on a mission which ended up taking her, as she puts it, "from the White House to the garbage dumps of the world."

I left inspired about what God can do with something as simple and small as a shoebox. I think you will be too. Check out her story in this video.

Mary Damron - "The Shoebox Lady"

Nothing to Say In Reply

There's a great verse tucked away in Acts 4. I turned to it this morning and, although I've read the verse several times, a new insight hit me. Here's the back story to the verse:

The Jesus movement is still pretty new. Peter and John are out preaching and they end up healing a guy who couldn't walk. This upset the establishment (religious leaders), which happens when control freaks lose control.

They throw Peter and John in jail for the night and then the next day begin to interrogate them. They ask them "By what power, or in what name, have you done this?" And so Peter boldly stands up (to them) and tells them that they healed the guy in Jesus' name.

Here's the great verse in this passage. John 4:13-14 "Now as they (religious leaders) observed the confidence of Peter and John and understood that they were uneducated and untrained men, they were amazed, and began to recognize them as having been with Jesus. And seeing the man who had been healed standing with them, they had NOTHING TO SAY IN REPLY."

Two things stand out to me in that passage. First, Peter and John lived their lives in a way that made people recognized that they had been with Jesus. And second, they lived their lives in such a way that at the end of the day, when they had to give an account, no one could find fault with them - they had nothing to say in reply.

Crazy Friday

Have you ever had one of those days that seemed like you woke up in the Twilight Zone; you just find yourself in experiences that you normally don't have. That was yesterday for me.

It started off with an interview by Comcast SportsNet. Here's the back story.

Every year, before the big Redskins/Cowboys game, our church puts up two big banners up on one of the busiest corners in Northern Virginia. The banners are burgundy and gold (Redskins' colors) and simply say "LOVE THY NEIGHBOR (Even If They're a Cowboys Fan)"

Over the years we've gotten tons of attention from those banners. It's been the conversation of radio talk shows, it's on a local, by fans Redskins trivial page, and we've even had people from the community email us asking if it's going up again this year.

So this year we got a call from a guy at Comcast SportsNet wanting to do a piece on the banner and run it as a part of their pre-game show kickoff this Sunday before the game. I love it when our church, or any church for that matter, gets 15 minutes of fame with the local community. Only good can come from that.

So that was crazy enough. Then, I got a call from the White House. That's right, the White House. It turns out the President is going to be visiting a home on the street behind our church this Monday and they need a lot of parking for the media, Secret Service and staff. So here I am on Friday talking with a White House staffer about using our church's parking lot for the event. It was a low level staffer, I'm sure, but still - crazy.

Who knows, maybe the President will see our banner and want to ask us about it.

So that's my crazy day.

A Gentle Answer

I was reading Proverbs 15:1-4 this morning. Solomon has some pretty strong words about how we speak to people and what we say. I love how he starts..."A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare. The tongue of the wise makes knowledge appealing, but the mouth of the fool belches out foolishness."

Image what our lives would be like if we followed Solomon's advice, just in our relationships alone. What if I gave gentle answers to...

...my kids - deflects anger

...my wife when we disagree - deflects anger

...my boss when we don't see eye to eye - deflects anger

...gentle answers to the police officer who stops me for speeding - ok that goes with out saying.

What would happen if the Church, followers of Christ, used the tongue of the wise. Solomon is saying that the way we speak and the attitude we have when we speak either makes people want to listen to what we have to say or it angers them by what we say.

What if Church leaders used the tongue of the wise? How would that affect the way the world sees us. How would it affect our political landscape? How would it change the moral and social debates we're having in this country.

Here's what I think. It's easier to be disagreeable than it is to be gentle. It's easier to "speak the truth in love", which is usually code for being mean and feeling ok about it, than it is to speak with the tongue of the wise.

I think more than anything else, I want to be wise and gentle. It seems like those two things are the combination to many open doors.

Taking a Break From the Lord's Work

I read an interesting article in the New York Post this week, titled “Taking a Break From the Lord’s Work.” Here’s the first paragraph from the article:

The findings have surfaced with ominous regularity over the last few years, and with little notice: Members of the clergy now suffer from obesity, hypertension and depression at rates higher than most Americans. In the last decade, their use of antidepressants has risen, while their life expectancy has fallen. Many would change jobs if they could.

It’s a shame that the New York Times can see what so many church leaders can’t; that rest is not just important, but essential for physical, emotional and spiritual health. It seems that when we violate the fourth commandment (the one about taking a Sabbath rest each week) we end up violating so many other commandments.

I have a formula that has served me well over the last several years. It's one that I try to model as a pastor. It goes like this: divert daily, withdraw weekly and abandon annually. Basically, I try to get some quiet time everyday, take a day off to worship, rest and focus each week, and at least once a year I take a week to get away from it all and unplug.

I wish every believer, and particularly church leaders, would follow this formula. I believe it would lead to greater health in our churches and families.

Saturday, my family will leave for our annual week at the beach. I won’t be completely off the grid, but close. If there’s an emergency that I need to know of, staff will be able to reach me. But with the exception of our Kenya Team’s posts, I’ll be unplugging for the week. That means no FB, Twitter, Email, BlackBerry, blogs, etc.

That’s a challenge for me. I love being connected. But abandoning annually means better health and better leadership and that's what I'm going after.

Master Plan

I had a hard time sleeping last night. We had our second meeting with the architect who's helping us develop a master plan for our church's building and property and I'm pretty excited about some of the things he presented to us. He gave us some amazing ideas about how to solve some of our existing problems with our building.

I love looking into the future at what can be if we trust God to get us there. It's definitely going to take a miracle to pull off any building plans, but the God I know is a God of miracles.

Summer Ministries

I remember when our church used to, pretty much, take the summer off. We did Vacation Bible School for kids and camp for youth and that was about it. That’s not the case anymore. Summer still has a relaxed feel to it, but we are plugged in to a lot more ministry than we used to be between June and Sept.

Summer is also a time when we are getting ready for our Spring and Winter events, projects, and ministries. Staff and leaders are meeting and planning and beginning to talk about some of the things that will be coming up in the months ahead.

Between what we are doing now and what we are planning for the Fall, things can get a little confusing. So let me see if I can clear up some of the confusion that I’ve heard of. Hopefully I won’t muddy the waters further. Please read the entire article.

Sports Camp – We are in the middle of sports camp this week and we’ve had around 50 kids attend. A large number of those kids don’t attend church at FCBC and many don’t attend church at all. Several years ago we made the decision to do sports camp rather than VBS because we felt it would be a better tool for reaching unchurched kids and presenting the Gospel. Sports Camp has helped us reach that purpose AND it’s been a great way to disciple kids who have already made a commitment to Christ.

Kenya Trip – We have an ongoing partnership with Nairobi Gospel Centre in Kenya. Our partnership includes training local pastors and leaders as well as helping NGC with anorphan care initiative. The team that is leaving next week will be training pastors in two areas: sports camp and basic children’s ministry.

The sports camp training will take place in Nairobi and Mombasa. The team will be working with Uncharted Waters (they do our own sports camp) to train several hundred pastors to lead a sports camp in their own communities. The children’s ministry training will take place in Nairobi. The team will be using training material produced by Kids At Heart Ministries to teach around 100 children’s pastors some basic skills for children’s ministries. We’ve led two similar trainings in the past.

We will also be providing NGC with one of the best resources we have – our Children’s Pastor.Elise will be staying an extra week in Nairobi to coach their team as they lead a Vacation Bible School. This is something they have asked us to do and we are pleased to support them.

Dominican Republic Trip – This was a last minute opportunity that we decided to go for.It’s a construction trip to help finish the third floor of a school. A couple from our church went to the DR earlier this year to distribute Operation Christmas Child shoeboxes. This is NOT an OCC shoebox trip. We will be taking another one of those in March.

The church that our team worked through has been building a third floor for their school and the trip this summer will help the church finish the project. The trip is Aug 7-14 and is relatively inexpensive. If you have a current passport and want to participate, let me know.

Back Packs for FACETS – We launched this ministry this past Sunday. For the next couple of weeks we will be collecting financial donations and school supplies for FACETS. We will also be helping FACETS with their Back to School Parties for the children of low-income families in Fairfax County. At the parties, the kids, with the help of adults, will pack their new backpacks with the school supplies they will need for their particular grade. If you have questions about this ministry, post a comment.

Water Wars/Operation Christmas Child Prep – On August 22 we will be having our annual “Water Wars.” Simply put, it’s a big water gun fight between our kids and adults. It’s a great family event and a wonderful opportunity to invite friends and neighbors who are looking for a church that knows how to have fun.

This year we are combining this event with some ministry preparation for Operation Christmas Child. The team will be getting info out soon about what kind of prep work we will be doing.We are NOT collecting ANYTHING for Operation Christmas Child at this point. We are simply doing some early prep work. So join us early for the OCC ministry prep. Or join us later for food and fun.

As I said, our summers are not what they used to be. It’s exciting that we can be a church that is able to slow down, relax, and get some rest in the summer while at the same time doing some great ministry in our own community and oversees.

'Homeless' Documents America's Forgotten Kids

Here's a link to a video that one of our ministry leaders posted on Facebook. Our church is gearing up for an annual ministry we do to help kids from low income families get ready for school. Basically we collect school supplies and backpacks and then throw a back to school party for the kids. At the party, adults get to help the kids pack the supplies they will need for their specific grade. A lot of the kids we meet are considered homeless; most of them live in hotels.

The video is a promo for an HBO documentary that airs tonight (July 26). I actually have a free subscription to HBO for the next month so I will be able to catch it. The documentary profiles the homeless kids and families of Orange County, CA, BUT these kids and families are in all of our cities and towns.

I've been to Orange County and have friends who live there. It's basically Fairfax County with palm trees. We have some of the very same problems as they do when it comes to homeless families.

Here are some stats from the video that were hard to hear:

• 40% of those who are homeless in America are families.
• 1 in 50 kids in America are homeless.
• The average age of the homeless in America is 9 years old.

I'm thankful for groups like FACETS in Fairfax County to help us help homeless families. I'm thankful we have a church that cares enough to get involved. I'm thankful we have people leading some of our ministries to the homeless who understand the need, some of them first hand.

If you live in Fairfax County, get involved with one of the many organizations, non-profits, churches and ministries who are working to solve this problem. If you live somewhere else, look for a place to plug in; if there's not a place, create one.

'Homeless' Documents America's Forgotten Kids

Pray and Play Retreat

Our staff is heading down to Lake Gaston, NC tomorrow for our annual Pray and Play Retreat. We take our entire staff plus their families and for four days we play and pray together.

There will be lots of boating, tubing, skiing, card games, kayaking, movies plus some great group devotions and concentrated pray.

I haven't made the commitment yet, but I'm thinking about completely unplugging for the four days.

Change of Pace + Change of Place = Change of Perspective

As I write this, my children, and many of yours are finishing their last hour of school for the year. Summer is finally here. It seems like this was a particularly long school year. But now it’s time to slow the pace for a couple of months.

I have a friend who’s a pastor. He has an equation that he uses in his personal life. It goes like this: change of pace + change of place = change of perspective. It’s a formula that I’ve used myself to evaluate where I am and how I’m doing in life and what God has called me to do and be.

As we head into summer, this is a great time to put this equation into play in our lives. Most of us will get away in some way this summer; a week’s vacation, a weekend get away, time off from work at home, a mission trip, you name it. Let me encourage you to take those opportunities to look for a change of perspective in some area of your life.

Here’s a few questions that have helped me discover some life-changing lessons as I gained a new perspective. They might be helpful to you:

• How am I doing spiritually? Am I growing the way I want or should? If not what needs to change? Do I need to add any spiritual habits to my life?
• How are my relationships? Is there healthy communication? Do we have healthy disagreements? Is there a relationship that is missing that I need to pursue this year?
• How is my work life? Do I find fulfillment in what I’m doing? Am I allowing God to use me at work?
• How is my relationship with my church family? Am I serving out of my SHAPE? Is there a next step of commitment that I need to take?
• How is my pace of life? Is it balanced? Do I need to slow down (do less)? Do I need to speed up (do more)?

A change of perspective may come with some challenges. I might have to give something up, or I might need to add something. It may challenge me to think or act differently. And there could be some risks involved.

But here’s what I’ve found over and over and over. When I have a change of perspective about things in life, it leads to growth. It makes me a better husband, father, friend, neighbor, leader, Pastor – a better person.

Change of pace + change of place = change of perspective. Go after it this Summer and see what God does.

Think Orange

I’ve just started reading a new book that I'm pretty excited about. I’m actually going to blog through it as I read the ten chapters. The book is called Think Orange: Imagine the Impact When Church and Family Collide... by Reggie Joiner.

You might ask, “Why orange?” Here’s basically what Reggie says about why he chose the color orange. Orange is a secondary color, created when you combine two primary colors – red and yellow. Orange is the outcome of taking two influences and combining them to create a vibrant effect that you couldn't get otherwise.

The principle behind the book is about two entities partnering to make a greater impact or to create a better solution. In practice the book explores the possibilities of what can happen if the church and the home combine efforts for the sake of impacting the next generation.

Reggie writes:

“I am not suggesting that the church and the home merely need to work concurrently and effectively in order to accomplish more…Working on the same thing at the same time is not as effective as working on the same thing at the same time with the same strategy. When you creatively synchronize the two environments, you get more than just red or yellow – you get Orange.”

Here's why I'm excited about this book and the work Reggie and his company have done.

A few years ago, a name was coined by those working education to refer to some of the parents they were encountering. The name was "hover parents." Basically, it describes parents who have a desire to be hands-on in nearly every area of their kids lives, especially their primary education.

The phenomenon took local schools by storm. All of a sudden they didn't just have parents showing up for sporting events to cheer for their kids or getting involved in the PTA. They had parents showing up in the classroom on a regular basis to volunteer. Teachers became inandated with Emails from parents wanting to give input about their kids' education. It created a unique problem for schools and teachers.

That same phenomenon, "hover parents," has reached the church.

Now, while many schools, administrators and teachers viewed it as an intrusion, I think church leaders should see it as divine intervention. A growing number of parents are no longer content to drop their kids off at Sunday School and leave the spiritual growth of their kids up to the local church. They want to be spiritual leaders in their kid's lives.

I'm one of those parents. Nothing gave me more pleasure than baptizing my own son or sitting with my wife and son while our daughter gave her heart to Christ. I love watching my kids grow in their faith and knowing that I am helping to shape that.

I'm also a pastor. And I love watching the church be a part of shaping the lives of kids and standing with parents as they raise spiritual champions.

But back to Reggie and the book. Here's why I am excited about this book. Left on it's own, the "hover parent in the church" phenomenon will cause nothing but frustration for both parents and church leaders. I've already seen some of that frustration in our own church and in other churches around us. The frustration of knowing the goal and seeing the potiential but not knowing how to get there.

But Reggie's company, The Rethink Group, has created some strategies to help churches and parents come together as two leading influences in kids lives to create a vibrant effect that you wouldn't get otherwise - Orange.

Here's an excerpt from the Rethink website:

Children and student ministry brings pressure. It can frustrate and bring joy.
It stresses and exhilarates. It makes you want to share victories and scream for
help. You’re here because you’re looking for answers. OK, you found us. Breathe.

We believe we have answers for you. They are in the form of a ministry strategy that, if you let it, can revolutionize the way you approach children and student ministries—even the way your church functions as a
whole unit.

I'm looking forward to "thinking Orange."

One of My Favorite Places

One of my favorite places is Fairfax Corner. In the warmer months our family will sometimes walk there from our house (about a mile) and get some Ben & Jerry's Ice cream.

Fairfax Corner is a town center complete with residential space, shops, an awesome movie theatre, restaurants, coffee shop and a fountain that is not only a piece of art but is designed for kids to play in. And did I mention the Ben & Jerry's?

I love Fairfax Corner because it's where worlds collide. Everyone from every walk of life is there, from kids to teenagers, to young adult and on up to older folks. On top of that, people from every place in the world are there.

I'm usually there at least twice a week. On Mondays I drop the kids off at school and then walk the dog over to FC. It's sort of a magical time because there's no one there at 9:00am. It's just workers getting ready for the crowd. Kind of like being on the beach early in the morning. It's a great way to start the week.

I'm also there on Thursdays. I don't work in the office on Thursdays; too many distractions for my ADD mind. So I work at Fairfax Corner, getting ready for Sunday and future messages and series. It's a great office.

One of the things that always comes to my mind when I'm there is how it would be a great place for a church. There's already a crowd. Great places to eat after worship. And what better place for a modern worship service than a movie theatre? Just a thought.

Re-Post

I was looking back at some old posts and thought this one deserved a re-post:

I'm loving the Dangerous Surrender series we're doing on Sundays and in small groups. Seems like God is really stirring some hearts to tackle some giants. I was really proud of Andrew and his friend Josh for standing up in front of the entire congregation and asking them to help the kids in our church help kids in Afghanistan.

Here are some stats that we used in worship today as we talked about Pushing Back the Darkness and what to do about evil:

• Human trafficking is estimated to be a 32 billion dollar business in our world today.
• Each year more than 2 million children are exploited in the global sex trade.
• There are twenty-seven million people who are slaves today. There are more slaves alive today than have ever been in the history of the world.
• It’s estimated that about 300-500 million people contract malaria each year.
• Approximately 2.5 million people die from malaria (a disease we have a cure for) every year.
• Every 24 seconds a child dies in the world from the lack of basic necessities.
• There are over 500 thousand children in foster care in the U.S. right now.
• In the U.S. there’s approximately 3.5 million people who are homeless. 39% of those are children.
• There about 2200 people who are homeless in Fairfax County alone. One of the most affluent counties in the nation. Half of those are children.
• 3% of the population of our nation’s capitol have HIV/AIDS. There are more people living with AIDS in Washington, DC than in West Africa.

“Anyone who knows the right thing to do but doesn’t do it is sinning.” James 4:17

Memorial to the 12 Disciples of Christ

I found this on Mark Batterson's blog and had to share it. Mark's an amazing reader and researcher, not to mention a great writer. I've had the pleasure, along the way, to get to know him and he's the real deal.

The way the 12 disciples of Christ lived and died is truly a testimony to who Christ was.

James the brother of John was killed with a sword during a persecution initiated by King Herod in AD 44. Andrew was hung on an olive tree around 70 AD. Thomas was thrust through with pine spears, tortured with red-hot plates, and burned alive around 70 AD. Philip went to Phrygia where he was tortured and crucified in AD 54. Matthew was beheaded sometime after 60 AD. Bartholomew was flayed after he refused to recant. After the removal of his skin, he was crucified in 70 AD. James the lesser was taken to the top of the Temple where a crowd gathered. When he refused to recant, he was thrown down. He survived the fall so a mob beat him to death with clubs in 63 AD. Simon the Zealot was crucified by the governor of Syria in AD 74. Judas Thaddeus ministered in Mesopotamia where he was beaten to death with sticks in AD 72. Matthias, who replaced Judas Iscariot, went to Ethiopia and was stoned to death while hanging on a cross in AD 70. According to Eusebius, the third century historian, Peter thought himself unworthy to die in the manner in which Jesus was crucified so he requested that he be crucified upside-down. And last but not least, John the beloved is the only disciple who died a natural death, but that doesn't mean he was exempt from persecution. He was exiled to the Island of Patmos and according to legend, thrown into a cauldron of boiling oil.